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Speeding Ticket

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Old November-27th-2002, 01:29 PM
  #1  
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Speeding Ticket

Speeding Ticket

Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.

Woman: Oh, I see.

Officer: Can I see your license please?

Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.

Officer: Don't have one?

Woman: Lost it 4 times for drunk driving.

Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Woman: I can't do that.

Officer: Why not?

Woman: I stole this car.

Officer: Stole it?

Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Officer: You what?

Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see.

The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please!

The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Woman: Murdered the owner?


The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.

The officer is quite stunned.

Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer snaps opens the clutch purse and examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

Woman: Bet you the lying bastard told you I was speeding, too.


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Old November-27th-2002, 06:53 PM
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thats funny as hell
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Old November-27th-2002, 07:38 PM
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That would of worked before the 90's, but now the po po have mics on the shoulders, oh well
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Old November-27th-2002, 09:50 PM
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ummm i don't think so...
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Old November-27th-2002, 10:57 PM
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That was funny.
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Old November-28th-2002, 12:41 AM
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too funny
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Old November-28th-2002, 08:35 PM
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I tried that .............. and let's say it didn't go so well.......... j/k
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Old November-29th-2002, 02:52 PM
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LOL That would never work but it is funny ..Jon
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Old November-29th-2002, 06:21 PM
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thats funny... Ive heard that before tho

you know cristy when I first was clicking on the link to open this up I was thinking, damn that girl got another ticket LOL
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Old November-29th-2002, 06:57 PM
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Originally posted by proman
I tried that .............. and let's say it didn't go so well.......... j/k
And lets just say threatening the cop doesn't work well either.
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