Riceboy 101
September-18th-2002, 06:12 PM
#1
WAZZU
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Seattle,WA
Posts: 613
Riceboy 101
I currently found this on a webpage and found it to be quite funny...remember that this is not my opinion, but opinions of some other webpage.
Chapter 1: Identifying a Riceboy
Welcome to the first chapter in our tutorial that brings you the truth behind the riceboy and his or her rice rocket.
Please note that we are not targeting any specific race, religion, or sex. The term "riceboy" can be applied to the female gender as well, but usually substituting "girl" with the "boy" portion of riceboy. Riceboys outnumber ricegirls, but we will focus on the typical thought process of a ricer in general.
1. Riceboy has a vehicle that is generally not considered a performance car, ("performance car" meaning it stems from the sports car or muscle car background).
2. Riceboy starts by adding visual modifications to the vehicle, to give it the image of "looking fast." This can be done by adding a body kit, a performance uni-blade windshield wiper, vast amounts of stickers strategically placed on any part of the vehicle, performance seat belt covers, PIAA driving lights that are fluroescent or blue colored, large exhaust tip (at least twice the size of the actual exhaust pipe), 130+ decibel stereo system, and an oversized rear wing/spoiler.
Keep in mind, THESE ARE NOT PERFORMANCE MODIFICATIONS. Riceboys think they are, and as a result will cruise around town like they are fast. Zooming around corners, riding laid back, and music cranked with the windows down to make it known that there is a loud stereo in the vehicle all to make it APPEAR as if they are tough, have a fast vehicle, and aren't to be messed with.
3. Riceboys "race" from a rolling start of about 30mph. This is not a real race.
4. Riceboys on several occasions will cruise the streets with their local car club which should actually be called a decal club. They typically flaunt their newest windshield stickers while sporting other offset sticker designs they came up with to promote the club for their economy-cars-turned-race-cars.
5. Riceboys call their exhaust systems "high-tech" sounding. We don't know about the rest of the world, but our farts sure don't sound remotely high-tech. Riced out vehicles sound like a fart, a gnat, or a swarm of bees when travelling in packs.
6. To draw more attention to their vehicles, when large crowds are in the area, they tend to drive by several times at about 6000rpm so everyone can see their immaculate vehicle speed by and fart. Riceboy drives fast or in crowded areas doing all that he can to attract the most attention and turn the most heads. Ultimately, this is riceboy's goal.
7. Whenever riceboys park, they like to keep their windshield wipers up. This is still a mystery to us, but for some reason this is cool. Why, we do not know. Maybe to prove that the ricer has the coordination and timing to turn off the vehicle before his or her wiper(s) retract.
Many riceboys deal with what they have. Unfortunately, they go overboard with whatever vehicle they can afford, was handed down to them, or was purchased for them by mommy and daddy. Because of this, there are literally several thousand 4-banger, 6-banger, and even some 8 cylinder vehicles roaming the streets with extremely poor taste in exterior body modifications. This poor taste somehow translates into an image of performance, and to the average person these vehicles might actually look "fast." Keep in mind that riceboys can drive any type of vehicle, not just an import.
Chapter 1: Identifying a Riceboy
Welcome to the first chapter in our tutorial that brings you the truth behind the riceboy and his or her rice rocket.
Please note that we are not targeting any specific race, religion, or sex. The term "riceboy" can be applied to the female gender as well, but usually substituting "girl" with the "boy" portion of riceboy. Riceboys outnumber ricegirls, but we will focus on the typical thought process of a ricer in general.
1. Riceboy has a vehicle that is generally not considered a performance car, ("performance car" meaning it stems from the sports car or muscle car background).
2. Riceboy starts by adding visual modifications to the vehicle, to give it the image of "looking fast." This can be done by adding a body kit, a performance uni-blade windshield wiper, vast amounts of stickers strategically placed on any part of the vehicle, performance seat belt covers, PIAA driving lights that are fluroescent or blue colored, large exhaust tip (at least twice the size of the actual exhaust pipe), 130+ decibel stereo system, and an oversized rear wing/spoiler.
Keep in mind, THESE ARE NOT PERFORMANCE MODIFICATIONS. Riceboys think they are, and as a result will cruise around town like they are fast. Zooming around corners, riding laid back, and music cranked with the windows down to make it known that there is a loud stereo in the vehicle all to make it APPEAR as if they are tough, have a fast vehicle, and aren't to be messed with.
3. Riceboys "race" from a rolling start of about 30mph. This is not a real race.
4. Riceboys on several occasions will cruise the streets with their local car club which should actually be called a decal club. They typically flaunt their newest windshield stickers while sporting other offset sticker designs they came up with to promote the club for their economy-cars-turned-race-cars.
5. Riceboys call their exhaust systems "high-tech" sounding. We don't know about the rest of the world, but our farts sure don't sound remotely high-tech. Riced out vehicles sound like a fart, a gnat, or a swarm of bees when travelling in packs.
6. To draw more attention to their vehicles, when large crowds are in the area, they tend to drive by several times at about 6000rpm so everyone can see their immaculate vehicle speed by and fart. Riceboy drives fast or in crowded areas doing all that he can to attract the most attention and turn the most heads. Ultimately, this is riceboy's goal.
7. Whenever riceboys park, they like to keep their windshield wipers up. This is still a mystery to us, but for some reason this is cool. Why, we do not know. Maybe to prove that the ricer has the coordination and timing to turn off the vehicle before his or her wiper(s) retract.
Many riceboys deal with what they have. Unfortunately, they go overboard with whatever vehicle they can afford, was handed down to them, or was purchased for them by mommy and daddy. Because of this, there are literally several thousand 4-banger, 6-banger, and even some 8 cylinder vehicles roaming the streets with extremely poor taste in exterior body modifications. This poor taste somehow translates into an image of performance, and to the average person these vehicles might actually look "fast." Keep in mind that riceboys can drive any type of vehicle, not just an import.
September-18th-2002, 07:23 PM
#2
Moderator/ Pocket Tuner
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Tampa,Fl
Posts: 4,150
macdaddyslomos top 10 rice list(dave letterman style
10. chrome fender flares
9. badly mounted can mufflers
8. 3" tips with no muffler at all
7. decals for parts not on the car
6. badges not intended for the car
5. painted steel wheels
4. lighted valve stems
3. krylon painted interior
2. double or triple level wings
and the number one riciest thing is..............revving on geo metro's and toyota tercels!!!!!!!!!!
10. chrome fender flares
9. badly mounted can mufflers
8. 3" tips with no muffler at all
7. decals for parts not on the car
6. badges not intended for the car
5. painted steel wheels
4. lighted valve stems
3. krylon painted interior
2. double or triple level wings
and the number one riciest thing is..............revving on geo metro's and toyota tercels!!!!!!!!!!
September-18th-2002, 09:54 PM
#4
WAZZU
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Seattle,WA
Posts: 613
Riceboy Rules Number 2 by Slanter at http://www.geocities.com/dodgedart270
2. Opinions In a debate, your opinions count as much as real facts. If you think that Mustangs are ugly, that counts for just as much against them as being a whole second faster in the quarter mile. Remember, facts take time to look up, whereas opinions only take seconds to dream up.
Here is a pretty good explaination on Rice:
Riced Explained
2. Opinions In a debate, your opinions count as much as real facts. If you think that Mustangs are ugly, that counts for just as much against them as being a whole second faster in the quarter mile. Remember, facts take time to look up, whereas opinions only take seconds to dream up.
Here is a pretty good explaination on Rice:
Riced Explained
Last edited by SEA_P5; September-18th-2002 at 09:56 PM.